Lunch Trauma
Is it bad to eat your own blood? If that's the case then I have fucked myself right up. What began as a simple cheese and pickle sandwich has become something of a cheap horror film in the form of my lunch today. I won't tell you just how our store of plastic cutlery came to be depleted as it will turn your stomach and make you want to eat with your hands forever more, but needless to say, there was not a cutting device to be found when I came to make my sandwich this afternoon. In these desperate (and lazy - I should have just walked over to Marks and Spencers and nicked some more) times one becomes rather resourceful, and I found myself scavenging the shop for a suitable replacement knife. Having had a fruitless lap around the place my attentions were turned to the DIY box (a horrible place to which I've vowed never to return) and I found a - for the record - brand new box of stanley knife blades. Before long I was slicing away at my mature cheddar like there was no tomorrow and was mightily pleased with my solution. Pleased that was, until I found that this answer to my problems was truly a double edged sword and I had in fac,t cut my fingers to smithereens. This realisation came after I had grapped my baguette with both hands. Of Course.
- posted by Kyle @ 4:13 PM